Friday 4 November 2016

Reasons to love English - Part One

I started a degree in Linguistics a few weeks ago, 30 years later than I originally intended to go to University.  I just couldn't get rid of this nagging feeling of having missed out on my education, so I thought I'd better go now, rather than add to that 30 years of regret.  I keep being told that University is about more than just an education, so amongst other things, I've involved myself in running a language group for some overseas students, who are all from either China, Japan or Korea.  Partly to welcome them to Leeds, and partly to try and explain some of the peculiarities of English to them.

What's written below is something that started out as a lesson plan for this week's session, but then it morphed into more of newsletter type thing.  I'm putting it on here in case anyone else finds it interesting.  Particularly people who I've already struggled to explain things to and who know me through English Steps might enjoy it.  Anyone else, please feel free to skim through it or not read it at all.

Compound nouns are the Cat’s Pyjamas!

Introduction

If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough. I think Albert Einstein said that, and I agree with him. Even though I’m a native English speaker, I sometimes find it hard to explain English to others in a way that they can understand. Here is my latest attempt.

A bit about me

My name is Jonathan. I grew up in Leeds in the 1970s. It wasn’t easy; all the carpets and curtains had terrible patterns on them and I had to wear a tie for the whole decade. Also, I mostly wore really itchy cardigans made of wool that was the colour of mustard. My mum had bought a massive ball of the stuff and she wouldn’t stop knitting me clothes made out of it. 

To add insult to injury, I was never allowed a haircut until it was at least 3 months overdue, and even then it would be a bad one. 
See above picture for evidence.

In the 70s there were only 3 channels on TV and apart from the news, it was mostly westerns and re-runs of Laurel and Hardy. There was nothing much to do in my spare time except run around and play football. That was great fun and it also helped me not to get overweight. Another plus about running a lot was that it helped me to keep warm. We had no central heating, only a gas fire and for six months of the year our house was freezing. Just to be able to go to bed on a night I needed hot water bottles and electric blankets. If you don’t know what they are, maybe I’ll explain that another time.

In those days, even reading involved exercise, because if I wanted a book, I had to go to the library to get one. And there was no internet, so if you wanted to know something you had to a) ask someone who knew the answer b) look in an encyclopaedia or c) remain ignorant.

But hey, I survived and here I am in good old 2016! And what am I doing now? Well, I’ve just started a degree in Linguistics at Leeds University and for a bit of extra fun I decided to run a language group with the intention of helping some foreign students with their English, and hopefully to make them feel welcome in my hometown of Leeds.

But just to be clear: I’m not an expert... on English or anything else. I’m at the very beginning of University life. The campus is full of people with giant brains who are experts on all sorts of things, so if you need an expert, go find one! But what I am is English. I’ve lived in England for a really long time, and some of that time has been spent ‘noticing things’. Anything you find written in this document is just a result of my observations of my own life. I haven’t fact-checked it with any boffins on high.

What are my aims for this language group?

This language group is only 1 hour a week for 5 weeks, so let’s be realistic. Even if I was a really good teacher, I couldn’t teach anyone the whole of English in 5 hours. But at the very least, and as the title of this newsletter suggests, I want to try and find some ‘Reasons to love English’. I love English myself, and I would just like to try and point out some of the reasons why. 
 
Is English easy or is English hard?

I would say it’s about 50/50.  Lots of things are easy about English. There’s only one article (‘a’ and ‘the’) and no complicated verb endings to learn (only -s for third person singular). But some things are very hard, for example the non-existent link between spelling and pronunciation, word order, stress, prepositions, tenses, phrasal verbs etc.

Some of the difficulty I think is that we have so many little words. For example, we use lots of little multi-word verbs (phrasal verbs) instead of using big words. Like instead of ‘disappoint’ we say ‘let down’ and instead of argue we say ‘fall out’. Knowing the individual meanings of the two separate words doesn’t help, because put them together and they mean something else entirely. And we use lots of prepositions, and we put them all over the place, even using them to end sentences with. Like I just did!

We had an interesting discussion in today’s group about whether academic English or social English is easiest to become competent at. Academic English being a challenge in that it’s quite technical but then it’s also focused in a particular range of vocabulary whereas social situations could demand a very wide range of topics being discussed.

Are English people friendly or unfriendly?

It’s hard to make generalisations, but from my own point of view English people are quite a friendly bunch, and I think Leeds in particular is a friendly place to live. But I’m a local so maybe I’m biased. Leeds is also very cosmopolitan, with a really wide mix of cultures and nationalities. I like to think of it as a smaller, friendlier version of London. However, there were mixed views in the group. Generally, the staff at the university were perceived as being very helpful but in the wider community it was a bit hit and miss.

Nobody calls me chicken!

During today’s language session I warned the students not to worry if they get called things like sweetheart, love, honey, darling, dear, pet, chicken, duck, mate or pal. Although it might seem odd to be called by names that are more appropriate for your partner, or for an animal, I assured them that it’s quite an affectionate thing. I’m glad I explained that because in China especially it would be quite insulting to be called chicken or duck. I promised them that in England no offence is intended!

Here in England, you’ll often be addressed that way by complete strangers in shops and people in the street! But don’t be alarmed! It’s generally meant in an affectionate way. Often these things will be said by older people to younger ones, but it could be anyone to anyone, so watch out!

Is English a boring language or is it fantastically creative and flexible?

Definitely the second one. To me, it’s an amazing source of creative ideas. For example, I love compounding, or word combining. Words like brainstorm, brainchild (one of my all-time favourites) weather bomb, bullshit, wallflower, superstar, feelgood, freestanding, heartbreak, sweetheart, tea bag, sleeping policeman, sugarcoat, speed bump, speed freak, nutcase, nutjob, weatherbeaten, swimming baths, idiot-proof, birthday suit, highlight, lowdown, suitcase, nutcase, headcase, nightmare, meltdown. Just reading that list gives me a warm glow of happiness inside. Those words alone should be enough to make you love English. We had a lot of fun with brainchild, birthday suit and idiot proof in particular in the group.

What I did on Saturday

On Saturday I went out for a meal to an Indian Restaurant in Headingley called the Cat’s Pyjamas. Which got me thinking... And I didn’t stop thinking for quite some time…
I started thinking about animal based idioms and phrases. For example.

He’s the cat’s pyjamas, he’s the bee’s knees. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C6s0VeSEVmE
You’ve made a right dog’s breakfast of that. See also pig’s ear.
Why can’t you sit still? Have you got ants in your pants?
Mum’s not speaking to me. I’m in the dog house.

I think English is brilliant at this sort of creativity. But I have a theory that this creativity is partly a substitute for being direct. English people are often hesitant about saying unpleasant or uncomfortable things plainly and straightforwardly. We shy away from talking about death for example, so we say that someone has ‘kicked the bucket’, ‘shuffled off’ or ‘passed away’ instead of just simply ‘died’.

Similarly, many English people don’t like to openly get annoyed, or ‘make a fuss’. We’d rather sit and eat cold soup in a restaurant than speak up and send it back, but then we’ll go home and say to each other ‘Well, I won’t be going back there again’.

Some of this is to do with childhood conditioning. If I ever complained or got angry as a child, I was made fun of and told off by my mum who would say things like ‘Stop whining’ and ‘Ooh, temper, temper!’. So much so that I find it hard to be openly annoyed to this day.

We discussed in the group, the fact that this desire to be polite and say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ and ‘sorry’ and ‘excuse me’ and to avoid confrontation isn’t necessarily compatible with being direct about our wants and needs. Even asking someone to pass the salt in England when you’re eating a meal with them can turn into a pantomime of ‘Would you mind awfully, if it isn’t too much trouble, passing me the salt?’ In the right tone of voice, it’s perfectly fine to say ‘Pass the salt, please’ but we don’t seem to realise this.

It’s one thing that I find refreshing about mixing with non-natives, they do tend to be quite direct and it’s good to hold a mirror up to my Englishness and realise that I find that same directness quite difficult. But, if we’re not careful, by not being clear and stating our real feelings we can easily end up being a bit ‘two-faced’ as we’re eager not to give offence when speaking to someone, but then we might go and have a moan in private afterwards.

Topical news - Halloween and Bonfire Night

On Halloween in Britain (31st October) children (mostly children, some adults too) hollow out pumpkins and put lights inside them and dress up as witches and skeletons and go round knocking on people’s doors saying ‘Trick or treat’ and usually adults give them sweets or money. By the way, trick or treat basically means ‘give me something nice (a treat) or I’ll do something nasty to you (a trick)’. Mostly in England people are tolerant and give out treats and so it rarely gets to the trick stage.

Apparently, this tradition stems from an old Irish folk tale. There once was a man named Stingy Jack (stingy is a word that means mean and ungenerous with money and it’s nothing to do with ‘sting’ like a bee sting). Jack was a pretty horrible person, and one time he played a trick on the Devil. Along with some other very bad behaviour, this eventually resulted in him not being allowed into either Heaven or Hell. As a result, he had to wander for all eternity in the darkness. But the Devil at least threw Jack a burning coal out of hell and so Jack hollowed out a turnip and put the burning coal inside and used it for a light. Over the years, partly I imagine because turnips are almost impossible to carve, and because the legend spread to America where pumpkins were more common than turnips, people started using pumpkins instead.

The story of Bonfire Night however, is based on real historical events from the year 1605. That year, some Catholics tried to plant explosives (gunpowder) underneath the Houses of Parliament in London. They were plotting to kill the Protestant king in an explosion so that they could put a Catholic King back on the throne. This was known as the ‘Gunpowder Plot’.

On November 5th the plot was discovered and the plotters were arrested. The man who was going to set off the explosion was called Guy Fawkes. He was charged with the crime of treason and thrown into prison. He was scheduled to be executed in a pretty horrible way so he jumped out of a window and killed himself instead.

Each year in Britain people go to Bonfires (originally this word comes from the words bone and fire as people used to burn animal bones to keep evil spirits away) and set off fireworks. It doesn’t seem to be as common as when I was a child, but people also often make replica ‘Guys’ by stuffing straw and newspaper into old clothes and these guys are thrown on top of the bonfires before they are set alight. Groups of children often make a ‘guy’ together and in the run up to Bonfire Night they take this round asking for a ‘Penny for the Guy’. A bit like ‘Trick or Treat’ people generally give them some money for their efforts.

Because these are traditions that I grew up with, I never really questioned them too much, but I did wonder this week whether they might appear strange to a non-native who encounters them for the first time.

The magic of word stress

English is a stress timed language, and altering the stress on different words in a sentence can change the meaning, even without changing any of the words. For example. Would you like a cup of tea? If you stress different words, it can imply very different things.
Would you like a cup of tea? making it clear which one of a group you’re addressing.
Would you like a cup of tea? Are you even bothered?
Would you like a cup of tea? Or would you prefer a pot?
Would you like a cup of tea? Or would you rather have coffee?

It’s hard for this to make sense written down, but if you say them out loud, you’ll get an idea of the different stresses and what they mean.

Well, that’s the end of week one. Thank you to all the group members for joining in so well and so enthusiastically. Without you it would have been a very dull hour! More exciting stuff next week, I hope.  I may even try some jokes!  Oh no!

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